I recently read through some old blogs I posted...you can see my progression from bitterly angry to having a more positive energy.

However, those blogs were painfully reminding me that I've been very selfish and hateful. As much as I don't want to admit that, I suppose it's true. And actually, I'm not sorry.

The worst question I've ever asked was "why?" And the worst answer I ever got was "I don't know. " and thats the same answer I still get whenever I ask any question. The secrets are out, I dont understand why there are still lies and more secrets. Apparently bad habits die hard for some.

So after all this time of still not getting real closure, I'm closing the door to this. I will never get the truth and frankly, I don't care anymore. Hate is a strong word but a very powerful feeling. And unfortunately, its a very real feeling.

My intention of being civil and fair will always apply, but believe me when I say everything now will cater to my kids and I, no one else. Ever.

The past has made me bitter And better...